HERE'S THE STORY

Yes, like a baby deer. Growing up, having a name like "Fawn" wasn't super fun as I browsed racks of license plate keychains never to find one marked with those four letters that made me. Why couldn't I be something cool and normal like "Ashley" or "Heather"?  Thankfully, I grew to love my name (thanks Mom!) and I find great joy in all the names people think I say instead: Sean, Sawn, Dawn, Fern - even Wanda once! (It's like people's brains auto-correct to what seems more accurate lol). I'm the girl who fundamentally loves rules and clarity but who also doesn't want to be put in a box labeled as "this" or "that." I thrive amidst order, yet long for the serendipity of adventure. I'm basically an oxymoron - though, aren't we all in some way? 

 

So far, in my 30-something years, I've had a great life. But it's also been a long journey of building up internal belief systems that led me away from experiencing the peace and joy God promises (I've got a strong inner critic, and man she's harsh!). Over the past few years, I've been on a slow journey to rewire the paradigm through which I engage with me - what I believe about myself, the words I choose to speak over my life, how I deal with the messy stuff of the mind, and well, life. It has been hard. It has been a little embarrassing at times. But it has also been freeing, hopeful, joy-filled, weight-lifting and confidence-boosting. As Dr. Henry McCord (a character from one of my favorite shows, "Madam Secretary") says about his daughter, "...she's a flawed mortal falling toward enlightenment." The same is true for me as I do my best to follow Christ in obedience. I am flawed, but I am on a journey and the good thing is I am not alone. 

 

Thus is born this little corner of the world where I share the things I'm learning, the questions I'm pondering, and the beautiful places I've traveled along the way. It is possible to thrive and grow and flourish in the dark seasons when it feels like all the wind has been drawn from our sails. It's in these moments, when the waters are still and movement seems scarce, that God beckons us to take one more step, to keep going, to believe in His faithfulness again and again. I am fully convinced of His goodness, and I hope you will be too. 

 

By day, I work as the Communication Director at our local church, having been on staff there for 14 years. I handle all the words and do my best to make sure all the things and stories are being communicated well. The best part of my life is being married to my best friend and the kindest guy you'll ever meet - Mr. Tim Ellerbrook. We've been a team for almost 13 years and I could not be more grateful to build a life alongside him. We have the fluffiest pup called Winnie and are always looking for the next flight deal to whisk us away on a new adventure. I also love to sing and paint and get lost in a good story. From casual hiking to road trips to hanging at coffee shops to staying home watching re-runs of our favorite shows, we enjoy the simple things of life. It really is a good one. 

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Oh and P.S. This blog has nothing to do with sailing, although I'd love to try it! You can read the story behind the title in my first post here.